Thursday 2 June 2016

Aidan The Aspie Critic: The Star Wars Holiday Special

Hello and welcome to this LOST adventure from a galaxy far far away! This is the Star Wars Holiday Special!
The Star Wars Holiday special is perhaps one of the most bizarre parts of Star Wars history. On November 19, 1978, the Star Wars Holiday Special aired once on CBS before disappearing from existence. George Lucas has personally said, and I quote, "If I had the time and a sledgehammer, I would track down every copy of that show and smash it." It has only just recently been released due to bootleg copies on the Internet. Is it really as bad as people say? Let's find out. So, you may be wondering, what happens in this movie? Well, the easier answer is, WHAT DOESN'T HAPPEN IN THIS MOVIE??????? The story is all over the place, almost to the point that there is no story! The basic premise of the movie is Han Solo and Chewbacca travelling to the Wookiee planet, Kazhyyyt, not Kashyyyk, to celebrate Life Day. However, that's pretty much the end of that. Most of the movie is spent with Chewbacca's family; his wife Malla, his father Itchy, and his son Lumpy. And from there it's cross-dressing cooking shows, circus acts, singing VR Diahann Carroll ladies, shopkeeping starring Art Carney, Bea Arthur cantina songs, cartoons starring Boba Fett, Harvey Korman robot instructional videos, Jefferson Starship music videos, and MORE!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! This story can barely even considered a story, it's barely there and all the little detours don't connect to anything! The Phantom Manace had a better story than this!!!!!! The performances are cheesy and worthless. Most of the time is spent with the Wookiees and Art Carney, even though the entire original Star Wars cast is in it, except for Alec Guinness. The special effects are awful as well. It's mostly just recycled stock footage, props, and costumes from A New Hope. The music also sucks. This I can definitely say with out a doubt that this is one of the worst movies I've ever seen. I'm serious, this is up there with The Lorax and The Hobbit: Battle Of Five Armies! I'm not kidding, this movie is so bad, it needs to be seen to be believed. It's hilarious! Watch it on YouTube! I'll put a link here: https://youtu.be/ZX0x-I06Fpc So, in conclusion, I give this movie 5 stars out of 5! This movie is amazing. Go watch it. Now.

Have you seen The Star Wars Holiday Special? What did you think of it? Tell me in the comments!

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